Believe it or not, this isn't as bad as you might think it's going to be! Hunky Horst Janson takes the title role as the "Conan" style warrior who arrives in a village where the folks seems to have prematurely aged. What's occurring? Well the trail leads him to the nearby castle of the "Durward" family where siblings "Paul" (Shane Briant) and "Sara" (Lois Daine) live. Now we already know that their ailing, bed-ridden, mother has a very specific diet - but we don't quite appreciate until the end just what her cunning plan is. It is going to fall to our hero to thwart this unnatural and downright dangerous plot from succeeding otherwise the menu is going to include a great many more folks! Nope, it's not good - there is far to much verbiage and nowhere near enough swashbuckling and impaling, but it's tongue is firmly in it's cheek and that makes it the more enjoyable. It's trying to be light-hearted and it knows the scenarios are predictable and the acting (especially from Caroline Munro) is as flat as it is occasionally hammy. Ketchup galore, some lovely pained expressions from the soon-to-be appetisers and a guest appearance from Wanda Ventham at the end top it off fine. It's eminently forgettable, but passes ninety minutes easily enough if you are in the mood for brain fodder with bite!