I went into this movie expecting it to be bad, which is fine, I've seen bad movies before and lived. I now feel uniquely qualified to say this, having experienced both: this movie is worse than brain cancer.

P.S. The movie theater we go to was selling Aquaman 2 novelty cups to everyone who ordered a large. Having seen Aquaman 2 when it came out, I joked to my partner, "You're gonna be wishing we saw Aquaman instead by the time we're done with this." I was not wrong.

Damn, we're already milking early 2000s culture to trigger the dopamine buttons? Sometimes I wonder how blockbusters in the future will try to evoke the current era. How do you copy an era that's almost nothing but nostalgia, an era that coasts almost entirely on recycling stale ideas, IP and music from 20 to 40 years ago? _Madame Web_ finds itself at a similar creative dead end. Why does Sony keep persisting on reviving this wave of forgotten B-movies from the early 2000s? I had some fun with _Venom_ because of Tom Hardy's ridiculous performance, but I see no artistic merit with this or _Morbius_. It feels like everyone involved is several degrees of incompetent, or they simply didn't care. In fact, I probably already put more effort into this review than these screenwriters did with their script, so I see no reason to analyze this any further. Avoid at all cost.

1/10

I thought it was pretty neat. It's not Endgame, but it's not trying to be. It's a pretty small, kinda old-school self-contained superhero movie that doesn't do much to heavily worldbuild. It doesn't even have a post-credits scene with Sam L Jackson. But I thought it was pretty neat for what it is.

Movie isn't as bad as everyone says it is. Treat it like an origin story movie that sets the scene for a larger universe...

Yes, first hour is pretty slow and at times the dialogue is clunky but you can still find enjoyment out of the film.

If only I can get my time back, what disaster of a movie. I couldn't think that Marvel could do worse than they already have but somehow they did with this.

"When you take on the responsibility, great power will come.”

If you were here to see Sydney Sweeney she’s in a spidey suite for 25 seconds of the movie. This movie is goofy. The Amazon spider people had me dying laughing. The dialogue is poor, not as poor as Sony is to be making this garbage. No explanation other than for the trailers to have villain look like spiderman. The action is lame, but atleast how awful the third act set piece looks made it slightly entertaining. I’m begging you Sony please stop making these. I’m sure Kraven will be just fine…..

You know what time it is, “It's Webbing Time”.

First trailer dropped and I'm feeling pretty meh about this so far.

The bad guy gets killed by a big piece of product placement.

Wtf did I just watch? Horribly written, horribly directed, the three girls suit up for less than 30 seconds, and it's all flashforward montages, what a fucking tease. Awful film, thank god for cam copies.

Dreadful Piece Of Diarrhea RATE 0/10

Super Stoked
For This Can't Wait
For Valentines day
Feb 14th 2024
(I might actually enjoy
that day for the first
time in like forever).

This Looks Epic AF.
"Peter Tingle 2.0"

lmao, they thought putting two attractive women will do the job. Everything is shitty and crappy.

This lady is caught lacking on her paramedic job :joy::joy::joy: