Shocking nobody, _Mortal Engines_ was not very good. Trying to jam way too much into two hours than is reasonable, it instead delivers on zero things. I guess I was **kind of** interested in the character of Shrike, but that was really the whole of my positive experience with _Mortal Engines_. Maybe if this thing had come out about eight years ago in the **height** of the bizarre Steam Punk obsession that gripped the globe (even if it was a weird sort of obsession where everybody called everything they like, and themselves Steam Punk but it really wasn't required to have any relation to actual Steam Punk) then the movie could have at least done well financially, but there's no world wherein this version of _Mortal Engines_ is a consumate film.

_Final rating:★★ - Had some things that appeal to me, but a poor finished product._