I will start by saying the smile on my face hurts as the post credit rap has just played out...

English as we know it has been around for about 600 years yet there are still no words to describe how bad this movie is, and the faint buzz in my brain is as close to its approximation of my laughing in a vacuum.

Sweet, Zombie Jesus.

Clearly trying to ride the coat tails of Piranha 3D (which I thought totally hit the mark it was aiming for and had a lot of fun with - see my shout) this... I want to say abomination but I reserve that for the truly bad, so whatever sludge abomination floats on... is something to behold.

Don't get me wrong, I knew it was going to be bad and it was the critic buzz that a sleepless night at an ungodly hour drew me to it. I was hoping to be lulled in to a deep sleep however found myself in a manic state of hilarity and shouting at the TV.

The first 30 minutes actually have a few really good lines that in another film, say Tucker & Dale vs Evil, would have been hilarious. Here however they sully the rest of the film with an iota of potential.

Now, I will take a stand and say that the 3D was not as bad as some have said, however everything else was being kind.

Joel David Moore has hardly had a noteworthy career, but when you see "that B guy from Avatar" slumming in this detritus it does make you sigh for the industry.

The premise alone is inane, the script generally abysmal, the acting is DOA and the special effects are non existent.

Post credits had me howling as the absolute seriousness with which they rhymed showed balls they should carry in wheelbarrows... that and the guy who lost his arm now has it missing on the other side! Gold.

If I had to dip back in to English entomology for a description I'd go with earsgang; something that leaked out of my arse.

Totally earsgang!

My roommate mistakenly thought we were going to watch a movie called "Shark Knight". If only.

_Final rating:★½: - Boring/disappointing. Avoid where possible._

Decent watch, could watch again, but can't recommend.

If you're just into romantic comedies, this might work for you, and it's not a bad movie, but it's not a very strong movie. It's a "two guys are going to fight over a guy" trope that tries to stand out by the guy who isn't obvious being a "dream celebrity".

The chemistry between that actors isn't great, and the scenarios are very contrived. While it a fun movie, it feels like acting when good acting feels very natural.

In a world where we have so many options, it's just hard to tell anyone to prioritize this one.

Good watch, might watch again, and can recommend if you like horror / sharks.

I imagine for someone who doesn't care about sharks, this might actually be a little boring. They're used really well for a horror mechanic, there is almost a Rob Zombie vibe to this one.

The weirdest part of "sharks in a lake" is how the sharks are surviving, or if we believe the movie discussion that it's a "salt water lake". There are lakes of weirder stuff, so a lake of salt water is reasonable, but it is very clear when you are in salt water versus fresh water.

It is honestly the biggest problem with the movie: the rest makes a lot of sense so it doesn't play with your suspension of disbelief. The story is well structured, and the actors mostly do a good job.

Overall, it's just not the best movie though. I personally don't mind forces of nature as adversity / antagonists, I liked "Crawl", but it has to done with a good delivery.

I don't feel like I care about the characters or the sharks all that much.

It feels like there should be options to just stay out of the water, which is what makes "sharks in the ocean" scary, its harder to get away.

In the end its a good watch that feels like it should be a great watch, but that could just be critical thinking defeating my movie experience.